Helping you navigate the tension between faith & mental health by looking at a tension point, a talking point and a truth to ponder.

Tension Point

“I’m burnt out, but I’m a church leader and feel like I’m meant to be the strong one. I know I should reach out, I just really don’t want to be a burden.”

Talking Point

There are so many reasons we don’t reach out for help, but one of the most recurring things we hear is “I don’t want to be a burden”. Often this reason is coupled with another inner narrative: we believe we are meant to be the strong one. The person other people rely on. The carrier of burdens, not the giver of them.

This is a noble notion, but here is the harsh truth: it’s misguided, misinformed and (I hope this doesn’t sound too dramatic) dangerous. It is a short-cut to burnout and breakdown.

Put your own oxygen mask on first.

When was the last time you were on a plane?! Before every flight, you will hear this very important piece of safety advice: put on your own oxygen mask before helping anyone else. Doesn’t sound particularly heroic, does it?! Surely we are meant to jump to the aid of those struggling, whatever the cost?!

But it’s the opposite. The BEST chance you have of helping those around you and ‘not being a burden’ is to make sure your own mask is attached. Without it, you are no help to anyone.

Not taking care of yourself, can mean you begin to experience burnout, stress, fatigue, reduced mental effectiveness, health problems, anxiety, frustration, inability to sleep, and compassion fatigue.

Are you experiencing some of those symptoms today?

Truth to Ponder

Is it time to put on your own oxygen mask? If you're holding out on seeking support because you are worried about being a burden, you need to take a few moments to think about this: those people you are trying to protect DESERVE to have you at your best!

Even Jesus needed to practice self-care.

In Mark 6:31 Jesus and the disciples are exhausted, so he suggests they take themselves off to a quiet place to get some rest.

Why? Because we can’t give what we don’t have. So making sure we are stocked up emotionally, mentally, physically and spiritually for the demands of the people and circumstances around matters.

Top Tips
Here are a few ways you can take care of yourself today:

Stop feeling guilty that you’re taking the time you need to take care of yourself.
Stop making yourself so available all the time and learn when to put your phone away, set boundaries.
Carve out time to do the things you want to do, not just the things you should, could, must, ought to do.
Be deliberate in fuelling your body with healthy food.
Exercise more. Your body needs to be fit for purpose and the endorphins will make you feel better.
Learn to process. Journal, sing or chat things through with someone you trust.
Pray. Connect with God, the source of strength, hope, joy, peace and energy that is never ending, always available and divinely effective. In Matthew 11:28-30 Jesus urges us to 'learn from me, my yoke is easy and burden is light.'